Off love and heartbreak

If I was the "bestest thing that ever happened" to someone ... then why the lies to ruin what we had? If I was supposed to be so "giving and loving" then why is it that i got no love in return? I never wanted anything but love, care and honesty but all i got was lies, deception and piece by piece of heart break till nothing remained but shattered pieces that left me with nothing but emptiness and pain. Lots and lots of pain. You broke me.
You have made me into a demon. I don't trust, I'm suspicious of everything, I think love is a lie. You proved to me that there is no such thing as love. It's a lie.
You said i made you into a "better person". Why did you change me into the worse possible being alive? Why did you ruin love for me? Why did you make me a lie to all? I lie that I am happy. I'm not. I'm broken and no one can fix me.
A game of deception played not by one but by many that are present. Everyone you knew played a part.
You have made me believe that everyone lies even if they don't. You made me so insecure that I don't have faith in anyone. You made the word marriage a joke. Now I can't trust anyone when they talk of marriage, it makes me unsure of myself. Your flings in the name of friendships with the opposite gender have made me doubt all kinds of friendships. Then you asked me to forgive you.
I guess some part of me has forgiven what you did, but then there is another part of me cannot forget what you did so who do I recover from that? I feel like, love an any other related emotion is fake. The demons you have given me keep telling me everything is a game. Your mind games were well played. So yes you were the first and last person who broke me.


A personal ode to love.