The mysterious case of Banker Bawarchi and the Treleche!

 A couple of weeks ago a colleague of mine, now popularly known as ‘Banker Bawarchi’ made us taste his decadently delicious sponge cake, that I am assuming he made himself. The small bite of heaven, that I could fight for, was basically vanilla sponge with cream and hints of cinnamon. What made the cake divine was the amount of condensed milk that was absorbed within the sponge. So since my nephew’s birthday was coming up, immediately an impulsive order was placed! And boy did I NOT regret the impulse!!

Now the cake has a really cool name that I can’t pronounce for the life of me named Treleche and the pricing is really good, its affordable and you can collect it from the residence (like most home based bakers and cooks). Yesterday was the day when we got my order and we had a go at the cake. Now since we all had at least two slices each, I can safely guarantee that it was really good, like literally, really good. The condensed milk soaked sponge with the cream topping and cinnamon powder was literally the new ‘death by vanilla’ idea for me!

Would totally rate it a 5 because it is like a bakery cake but with the homemade appeal! 

#BankerBawarchi #Treleche #cake #spongecake #vanilla #condensedmilk 

The flopness of Brite!

I think advertisers today are losing their minds. Most of the ads that we see don’t make sense. One such ad that I would rave and rant on and on about would be the Brite ad. It’s not only lame, its completely off the bucket. Literally.

The ad commences with this nice well-groomed lady, who looks at an article of clothing and tends to renaissance on the past where a waiter dropped food on her, and while she kept lamenting that the stain wouldn’t go away, the manager not only struck of their bill, but also advised the lady to ‘try Brite’. Low and behold the next screen shows the lady with her daughter-in-law who is none other than the restaurant manager.

This ad is so so sooooo wrong on so many levels (at least in MY opinion, you’re entitled to yours if you like it). The first shot of the ad shows the lady in a nice airy room. Looking at her, you can see she belongs to the upper class with her persona and surroundings. She has her son’s (or husband’s) shirt in her hand and is remembering the past when she went with her family to some restaurant for dinner. The next frame, shows the same woman whining and complaining to the waiter for dropping food on her … (which okay honestly speaking we would do as well, while demanding to see the manager). Within the same frame the manager (a female) is standing in the corner noticing the scene and comes to the table (like any manager would), here the aunty’s son does the ‘pehli nazar maaf’ thing and looks at the girl … or rather has an eyeful of the girl!

If you look at the female manager she is impeccably groomed with flawless hair and makeup and HONESTLY I have yet to see PERFECT party make up on female managers when we go to restaurants. Anyway the manager apologizes, the next line would have irritated any normal customer, but this aunty went a step ahead and said that the stain won’t go. The manager not only cancels the bill, but also advices the lady to use ‘Brite’. Now the issue here, atleast for me is that in any NORMAL scenario, if someone dropped food on us, we’d simply ask for the manager and they wouldn’t give a freebee meal, but would cut a percentage of it, also if they were to ‘advice’ us to use a specific detergent, most of us would get really pissy and tell them to shove their advice where it belonged. Secondly, MOST of the managers are male … so they don’t usually do this … I hope!

The final scene that bungles my mind the most is that the girl (manager) is now the aunty’s daughter-in-law! Seriously?! I am not being mean or heartless but all I want to clarify here is that usually girls from low income backgrounds usually work as restaurant managers and thus to show one married into a high end family is seriously off the rocket. The whole concept is completely cliché. Not all stains have a story, actually most often than not stains DON’T have a story, be it a sibling dropping food on you, or you yourself dropping food (other anything else)! Not only this it DOES NOT lead to marriage. The only thing that can be said over this rant is that please choose advertising agencies for this quality of work NOT because they have been in the market for long or are considered as major brand names.

Try new agencies, I am sure they will give better ideas, after all businesses need new blood (in this case it needs a complete new body!)

#Brite #Rishta #washingpowder #restaurant

Free bird

Over the past few days the feeling of being stuck in a trap that refuses to let me go has become stronger and stronger. It feels like I am stuck in a vortex where people are pushing me to my limit and I don't know what to do, who to believe and who to let close to me. Life is supposed to be simple and easy. So why ans what does it make it so complicated? Is it greed? Hate? Lust? Desire? Jealousy? I wish I could understand but I don't. I want to fly free like a bird that has no worries, fearlessly slicing though the air like there is no tomorrow. Spreading my wings and feeling the wind pass through the outspread feathers making me one with creation. How I long for a life well lived, with no stress and tension, no worries and fear. I hate the fear of the unknown. It claws at my soul and makes me want to run. Run away from this life and start again. To right all the wrongs so that the mind can be free and at peace.

That is the only thing that the heart desires.

The mind boggles

My mind is a jumble of words that are bursting to come out in a flow of words that may or may not be understood, but when I actually start, well that is the time everything goes blank and it seems that all emotions and thoughts are forgotten and I stare blankly at the screen trying to understand where to start from and what to write. The mind is a confusion of thoughts and ideas with stories from the past and present that are bursting to come forth and be known to all. It is life itself that brings about the randomness of ideas that make us believe what we want and how we want it to be. so you see … to be or not to be … that it definitely the question. 

HBL ki Rosheen Khan!

It’s been a while since I wrote (or maybe not), but HBL is at it again it seems. First it was the lady (Samina Baig) that climbed the mountain and that’s all she did (we are still trying to figure out if HBL sponsored her climb or was using her as an endorsement or neither!) and now it is the diver – correction scuba diver named Rosheen Khan who is making her mark on the ATL score.

The ad opens with a cute little girl looking sort of gloomily at the fish (can’t decide whether she wants it as a pet or just eat it I guess) and lands in a boat with a “I’m the king of the world” action … to show that she’s enjoying the air maybe … with the voice over that talks of dreams that have to be fulfilled. Suddenly we’re underwater and everything is about “under the seaaa ... under the seaaaa … darling its better down where its … take it from me!”

The moment of pride is when we get to know that she is the first female scuba diver (go girl power!). Oh completely forgot there is a moment of almost ‘fear’ when a shark swims by and she … sort of sinks … but rises from the depths all triumphant and proud. The ad ends with the, “Khawab kisi ameer ya ghareeb ki jagir nahi”.

Overall the ad seemed really blue (pun intended). It seemed to have a sort of melancholy outlook to it. It is understandable that the underwater scenes would obviously be blue. Yet it lacked the brightness (may the marine life or the fact that cartoons like “Little Mermaid”, “Finding Nemo” and “Finding Dory” have given me a brighter perspective of the underwater world!) kind of giving it a depressive tone to the ad. Shouldn’t she be happy that she is the first female to do this? It seems that she is sidelined and not really the main person for the ad … but a spectator herself trying to absorb what is happening about her.

Finally throughout the ad I see zilch of what HBL did for her … except maybe have their logo on her costume. Nothing what-so-ever is highlighted about the bank or how it facilitated her during the hardships that she may have faced during her training. IF HBL really wants to talk of ‘enabling dreams’ then they should focus on people who are up starts, make something out of them and then proudly proclaim that THIS is the person who WE have enabled in achieving their dreams. 

Ad Rating: 2 winks. 

HBL anyone?

HBL has recently celebrated a completion of 75 years. We have been seeing the HBL “75 years” logo in all different print ads that have been shared over a period of time. But since the past few days their building has been gloriously bright with their signature green color and lighting effects as well. (Funny even UBL plaza has taken on the color green, I guess in part to show unity with HBL. To be called a part of “I am HBL”).

Coming back to HBL and its 75 years, the celebrations have print ads showing the tall HBL plaza building or rather a white sketch of HBL Plaza on a palette of different green shades (fifty shades of green maybe). Now when I look at the message all I can think is off a tall, proud old man who is standing in this patriotic garb screaming out how he has changed lives and is boasting of nothing more that empty promises of ‘enabling dreams’.

The final call, “I am HBL” doesn’t resonate with me. Why? Because I am truly not a part of HBL. Do they even know that their services have completely gone to the dogs? I wonder when was the last time they carried out a customer survey or awareness program to know what people ACTUALLY think of their bank? They need to have a true eye opener that through they maybe an ‘old’ bank they are definitely not the best around town.

PS: apologies about the literally off image that is shared. HBL has no other images to offer on google that could be added for 75 years!!

Zalimmaaa ab tu ponstan khila dei!

Coke has been affiliated with music for quite some time now, with its coke studio going strong to season 9 along with singers and songs that are over the roof and have driven the nation to enthusiasm. The same is seen with its ad, the new in thing called, “Zalima coca cola pila dey”. Social media is bombarded with this line with memes and comics that have literally made not only the youth, but the old sing it out as well. The original piece, sung by Madam Noor Jehan (more so ear piercing than the modern counterpart) has paved its way now for Meesha Shafi and Umair Jaswal to sing it as well.

Looking at the ad it begins in a studio where yours truly the popular Meesha Shafi (looking all preppy), Umair Jaswal (not to preppy) and a cute sort of guy that seems to have a squint are sitting in the studio and the cutie starts to play the tabla (I think it’s the tabla). This prompts Meesha I guess to notice Umair and ends up eyeing him drinking (gulping) a coke instead! So she starts off with, “Sooonnaaayyaaa coca cola pila dey”. 

The candidness begins and he gives her a cheesy smile and keeps the bottle on a big red button (that OBVIOUSLY) makes them go on air (mistake tha jee) so that he too can partake in the singalong. Mr. Umair starts off with the zalimaaa bit and the scene goes to hottie 2 in a kiryana store where he does the pulling dance (you know the one where your roping in the person and pulling them! Disclaimer: Done at mostly all dance functions to showcase excite or the lack of dance talent!) with a bewildered shop owner starring at him (the expression can clearly be translated to, “has idiot has completely lost his mind or is high on something I didn’t get!”).

The ad seems to flow between various scenes like the one where there are two students in the library, both apparently listening to this on their headphones and the girl offers the guy her coke that he (literally with a shy smile) takes as well. Out of the blue, btw, there is a complete band as well, whom look like foreigners, playing to the songs beat as well. Within the ad day passes to night (with these guys still going strong on the Zalimmaaaaa) and a projector screen is seen with Misha Shafi moving to the beat (I thought they were on radio and the song was being aired by mistake but oh well) and a complete concert starts with people making the beat with the coke caps and empty bottles. The scene (finally) goes back to the studio were we see the three again and Umair realizing that the ‘On air’ sign was on hence rushing to remove the bottle from it thus ending the concert as well (I guess).

The concept and the song I love. Truly. But now the ad is a bit of an irritation than something that is fun to hear and enjoy. Coca cola (coke) has always come up with new ideas and concepts that literally create a pull and appeal to attract their consumers, but this ad when you literally forget the music for a bit and look at the scenes, tends to be a bit hopscotch. Maybe this was made to promote Coke Studio Season 9 or the concept of music that they are trying to get to but honestly … I just liked the concept of ‘sharing happiness’ better.

Ad rating: 3 winks.